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How to Help Someone Having a Panic Attack

Ronit Levy • Nov 22, 2017

Stop thinking about it! Don’t worry! You’re blowing this out of proportion! Be an adult! People say all sorts of things to someone having a panic attack. Some comments are well intentioned while others are just mean. Learn the symptoms of a panic attack, how long they last, and how to help someone having one.

person's arm sticking out of water for how people feel during panic attack

What Is A Panic Attack Or An Anxiety Attack?


A panic attack involves suddenly feeling a terrifying level of fear that comes out of nowhere. It can even wake you up out of a solid sleep.


They’re extremely common. They happen more frequently in women than in men. According to the Anxiety and Depression Association of America, they typically start in people’s early 20’s but can start as early as childhood.


Usually, after having a panic attack, people get anxious about being anxious because they’re worried about having more panic attacks. Some people will also develop a fear of places or situations that have caused attacks. They might start limiting where they go or only go out if someone is with them. This is called Agoraphobia.


Panic Attacks and Anxiety Attacks are the same thing.


Here’s some basic information about panic attack symptoms, what a panic attack is, and how to help someone having a panic attack. It’s a must read if you or anyone you know has ever felt anxious.


Knowing what’s up is a huge part of dealing with anxiety because you’ll feel in the driver’s seat instead of at the mercy of your emotions.


woman's eyes staring ahead for symptoms of panic attack

Panic Attack Symptoms


A panic attack is a combination of physical and psychological symptoms that make someone feel like they are facing imminent doom.


Common panic attack physical symptoms include:


  • racing heart
  • excessive sweating
  • tingling/cramps in arms and legs
  • nausea
  • blurry vision
  • trouble swallowing
  • trouble breathing


Panic attack emotional symptoms can be summed up in one word: terror.



People are usually terrified they are going to die, pass out, and/or throw up. They are also terrified that no one will help them.


young woman curled up on edge of bed because of panic attack

Why Saying “Stop Worrying” Doesn’t Work


During a panic attack, the rational part of the brain shuts down. The fight-or-flight center of your brain is in full control. This part of your brain is really primitive. It responds to danger and it’s job is to keep you alive. 


Your fight-or-flight center doesn’t problem solve. As far as your brain is concerned, if it thinks you’re about to die, it doesn’t want you to debate the situation or put together a spreadsheet. You need to escape. The end.


When you tell someone to “stop worrying,” you’re appealing to the rational part of their brain. That part is shut off. It’s been high jacked by the emotional brain. This part is built to respond, not analyze.


The person having the panic attack can’t process any data or rational explanation. They might not even hear you since our senses act weird when we’re panicking. Instead they’ll likely hear “blah, blah, blah…”


roller coaster tracks

How to Stop a Panic Attack: Don’t Say “Just Calm Down”


Unless someone has had Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) aimed at helping them deal with panic, it’s extremely hard to stop a panic attack.


CBT for panic involves 3 key elements:


  1. Learning what Panic Disorder is and how panic plays out in the body and brain.
  2. Accepting the presence of physical symptoms triggered by the brain during panic. It’s like a cascade of dominos: Once you knock over the first one, the other ones are going down and there’s nothing you can do other than wait it out. It’s a chemistry reaction beyond your control. 
  3. Managing the threatening thoughts that come up so that physical panic symptoms don’t become a full blown panic attack.


Unless someone has training and practice with these skills, they can’t really do anything for themselves during a panic attack. Telling them to just calm down is a lot like telling someone being mugged to just calm down.


life preserver ring in water for how to help someone having a panic attack

What To Do When Someone Is Having a Panic Attack


I contributed to an article on panic attacks featured on Time Magazine’s health site, Health.com. When working with the reporter, I provided a list of things not to say, explanations for how these comments can make things worse, and ways to be supportive.


Click here to check out the article.


If someone is having a panic attack, this is how you can help:


  • Acknowledge their distress.
  • Tell them you’ll stay with them to make sure they’re safe.
  • Suggest going for a walk together or doing something distracting.
  • Let them know their body might feel better if they take slow deep breaths.
  • Ask them who or what they need to feel okay. Is there a person you can call or a comfort item you can get?
  • If they want to go to the hospital, take them.
  • If they begin to hyperventilate, tell you they’re about to pass out, or say their chest really hurts, call 911 ASAP. The dispatcher will give you instructions on what to do while waiting for the ambulance. Stay with them until the ambulance gets there.


  • Don’t say anything to belittle them or minimize the situation such as:


  • suck it up and deal
  • be an adult
  • man up
  • calm down
  • stop it


If they could stop it, they would. No one wants to feel terrified they’re about to die.


woman surrounded by plants in nursery preventing a panic attack

Next Steps:


Panic attacks are incredibly common. If you have one, get information about them and help with managing them.


If you know someone who struggles with panic, be caring and understanding. Share this post to help them.


We’re all human and have a brain and body that sometimes go off the rails. Our best bet at helping ourselves and others is caring, education, and dealing with anxiety effectively so that it doesn’t take over.


We help teens and adults struggling with panic attacks by using a combination of cognitive-behavioral therapy, mindfulness, and education about how the brain and body work. It’s extremely effective in helping people get the relief they want. When you’re ready to get the support and coaching you need, give us a call.


Whatever your struggles, stay strong.



You can do this.



Please contact us to set up an appointment. 

We can help give you information, a map for next steps, and hope that you can have the life you want.

 

Wishing you the best,

Dr. Levy

Director

Bucks County Anxiety Center

 


Dr. Ronit Levy is a clinical psychologist and director of Bucks County Anxiety Center in Newtown, PA. She specializes in treating teens and adults struggling with anxiety due to Anxiety Disorders, OCD, chronic illness, and life events. Dr. Levy trains and supervises other therapists and presents on mental health in the community.


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